The following is e-mail that Gregg received from Amy Greenberg. For those of you who don't know Amy, she is the keyboardist for
The Woodhaven All-Stars and of course this was the band that Tom played bass in until he passed on in May 2005. Amy wrote a wonderful song to Tom entitled
'For the Catfish' (see lyrics and link above).
Dear Gregg, Thank you for your kind words. The song truthfully almost wrote itself. Your brother was very special to me and I somehow felt he was guiding me to write every word and note of the song. "The Catfish" was one of our nicknames for Tom because he played the blues, especially New Orleans style like nobody's business. Tom O' Brien, our drummer, and Bruce called him that and somehow, the name just fit him. He was a very complex person and probably one of the most talented people with whom I was honored to play. From the time I met him, I had always felt that he was never comfortable in this world and could not find happiness here. Having had cancer myself, we would often talk for long hours about coping with that and with life in general. I, belonging more to this earth, having always had my feet planted firmly in the ground like a sunflower, strong and sturdy, always aware of the sky but never forgetting my roots and always feeling comfortable there, while Tom was always searching for peace in other places and never felt comfortable in his own skin. It used to pain me so that he couldn't find happiness in the moments of his life. I didn't understand that because I stubbornly cling to every moment and treasure each one. I didn't understand how he couldn't see in himself and the world around him the beauty that seemed so clear to me. We all tried to show him all the treasure that was him and sometimes he would hear us briefly and then the doubts and sadness would take over and his search for peace would begin again. I truly believe that he has finally found the peace and light that he was so desperately searching for. I had written two other songs for him but I knew they weren't what I really wanted to say. When I wrote this one, I deeply felt his guiding hand and I knew that he would be alright. I think of him often and feel the peace and joy that is within him. I feel the lightness of his soul, unburdened of all pain. I would like to think that I am a better person because he has touched my life and I know that he taught me to become a better musician. He never believed that he was special and I just wanted to tell him how much he mattered to me and to everyone whose lives he had touched. When I close my eyes, I see his funny hat, and his silver hair and see him smiling as his fingers fly over the bass, weaving those special textures that only he could do. While I have only met Stephen, I feel like I know all of you, as Tom had spoken so much about his family to me so often. I will not mourn Thomas but will celebrate his life with every word I write and every note I play and sing. He will always be part of our stories and wonderful memories and will always be woven into the fabric of our music. Somehow I feel he knows this now. I tell my son Evan all the time that all people and things on this Earth are only on loan so we must act every day with kindness and treat people and life with care and simply feel blessed that we were given these gifts, even when we sometimes feel that the time we are given to hold onto them was way too brief. I hope you and your family can take comfort in the fact that your brother was loved and valued by his friends. He was lucky to have you, his family, in his life and you were lucky to have been given the gift of him. As for me, I am grateful that he was sent into my life. The last thing I said to Thomas was that I would keep going and that's just what I intend to do and he laughed and said he believed I would:-) Every once in a while, I look over my shoulder and feel him watching over me making sure that I will somehow keep my word:-)Thank you and your family for sharing your brother with me,Amy
